Ran with a local crew and had a smoke or two

WTF!!? This shit looks sooo dope!! Denver skate crew DTS is premiering their skate video this month! I love these videos so much, the music in them is always so ill. These dudes go hard as fuck. And the fact that this shit is local makes it even better! I cannot wait to see the full length feature!
The video premiere will be Saturday December 29th at Bobbo Warehouse. This event has some major big name sponsors. You know motherfuckers like DC Shoes, and KR3W do not put their name anything that isn't really really fucking berries.
Here is the flyer so you know where the fuck you need to be:

And here is a teaser to hold you over.

I just wanna party

I'm The General, and I'm the only one who parties. I'm going to party here, on Saturday. You should too.

New old shoes

So, something I've learned from my boo is that apparently sneakers namely retro Jordans are fairly serious business to a lot of people. This shit is new to me. Apparently people have been killed, trampled, and even raped for these sneakers!! (ok maybe not raped, I added that for dramatic effect, but you get the idea.) So when he asked for the Jordan XI's for Christmas, I thought... no problem. Then I learned that they were not to be released until 12/21/12, still seemed somewhat easy. Well with a little more research I learned that it's not nearly as easy as going to the store on the release date and buying the shoes. They have a fucking lottery system, yeah. WTF right? So being the amazing girlfriend that I am, I spent my weekend visiting nearly every shoe store in this fucking state and collecting tickets for my chance to buy (not win...buy) a pair of these fucking things! Apparently if you're lucky enough to have your ticket pulled, they call you and allow you to pay them $190 for a pair And no, they are not made of any kind of precious metal or gemstone or any shit like that, I asked. People are seriously crazy as shit when it comes to these shoes, and Michael Jordan is laughing his billionaire ass all the way to the bank. Well played MJ, well played.
Anyway my fingers are crossed and I hope they call. Baby's been moderately good this year and I think he deserves them. This is what the winning tickets look like (positive thinking)

Jones!!!!

Rumor has it this mixtape is pretty dope. You sould download it and see if that's true.






Pin-Up Pretty

This lady painted me! She is amazing! And I love her! And she just so happens to be running a special on her amazing paintings! You should have one of your face! This is hanging in my dining room. Yes.
www.imanwoods.com

Two girls one punch

This made me laugh hard. This video reminds me of a friend I use to have. Although she was really really good at starting fights, she herself had never actually been in one. Which was fine cos I had her back anyway.

Min-Mouth

Also since I've been gone, I've allowed my son to say a few select curse words. I kinda figured if they can say them on TV then why not, right? Now I don't remember exactly when I started cussing, but I def didn't do it in front of the rents! I'da caught an ass whooping quick.
Honestly this has been one of my more entertaining and hilarious parenting decisions. I've learned that with a limited roster of allowable curse words, Minion is forced to be more creative when cursing. He puts together the most inventive sentences simply to incorporate his new words!
These are currently his permitted curse words:
Piss: Because it's not really that bad of a word.
Dick: Because he owns one, and thus should be permitted to say so. Also penis is a creepy word I think.
Ass: Also because he owns one. And I suppose one could argue the whole donkey thing. Whatevs.
Shit: Well just because...
So with these five words, he creates thee most colorful sentences. And I'm not gonna lie, I'm kinda proud. And fuck, I'm well aware that I'll never win mom of the year or any shit like that, but all in all I've raised a smart, talented, good hearted, respectful kid. So I'm pretty much winning.
I lied... I got some new ink while I was gone. Before you judge this ugly little thing, you should know her story:
This one is for my Grandma May. She carried this ugly little doll with her to bingo, she said it brought her good luck. When she was too old to go to bingo the little doll sat on a ledge in her kitchen and watched over all of us as we laughed, cried, yelled and shared meals. After she passed no one know what happened to the doll, it seemed to have disappeared. I like to think that she took it with her and now they're both watching over us. I was lucky enough to find this picture of the doll, and thanks to the talent of my amazing best friend Zebediah, I will now carry her doll and her memory with me forever. Pure gold.
Hi, I'm back. Partially cos I have some shit to say and partially cos a few motherfuckers requested my return. So since it's been a while, let me update you on what's new in my world.

Absolutely fucking nothing.

Consider yourself updated. You're welcome.
This is funny to me...

and this...

Boom

My Minion. My world.

3.....2.....1... you know the rest

Well folks, I would be doing a disservice as a blogger if I didn't share with you new shit, local shit, and good shit. But as you know, rarely do you find shit that possesses all three of these qualities. Well look no further, cos here it is.
The debut mixtape "Lift Off" from the box states own Myke Charles (the artist formerly known as Purpose), mixed up by the infamous DJ Chonz. This one was released earlier this week, and fuck..... it's good! The whole vibe is super high and sexy. Yeah, I said sexy. This one def favors the ladies! But don't get it fucked up, it's not all chocolate and roses. There are a few of those bangers that FBC always delivers!
The vibe of this mix reminded me so hard of b.o.b.'s album 12th Dimension. That will forever be my favorite shit from b.o.b, on a count of it was real, and it was feel good music. I saw him for the 1st time in 2008 when he opened for 3oh!3.... yeah that was obviously before he blew up. I'm 97% sure you wouldn't catch him opening for the likes of them nowadays. This was also before he was on the radio, or even the radar for that matter. Obviously he's doing things on a much bigger level now. Big ups!
Yeah, so to be honest, that's the path that I see my dude Purp taking. The one that leads to the top. And what better way to begin your journey than..... LIFT OFF

So here you go lovers, it's a free download. You can thank me later.

While dropping my Minion off at school this morning, we pulled into the parking lane. I usually chill with him till the bell rings, we make fun of the people walking by or just bullshit or whatever. So from the car parked directly in front of us two children emerge. One rather large awkward white girl, and one small dark Indian boy. Obviously an odd combination for one vehicle. I can always count on my dude to state the obvious, and crack me up at the same time!

Mini: "Well..... They're either carpooling, or they're adopted."

This kid is fucking golden.

poke her face

Liquor in the front, Poker in the rear.
If you love Poker or Tacos you should come to this! If you don't love either you're fucking stupid and probably shouldn't be in public anyway.

kids these days...

Maybe it's cos I'm old, maybe it's cos I just don't understand, but I was recently thinking to myself how incredibly stupid our youth is these days. From the way they dress to their stupid facebook pics to the dumbest ass shit they say. Then I saw this, and it gave me hope. Shout out to my dude Jacob for keeping it classic in a sea of dudes rocking skinny jeans and bitches with the most ridiculous Donald Trump comb overs.
Another example of how awesome my people are. Boom.

My friends are better than your friends

My bestie drew this for me from a flick I sent him, he's so super talented. I miss him so much..... Sigh...

No llores

Watch this video, you will love it! Shout out to the CasualS familia for the fly rides! Shout out to my ATRmy for another banger, and shout out to Pape Dawg for the video hotness! Boom!

Duh

Beautiful Disaster

This show is tomorrow. You're not going to want to miss this shit! It's gonna be ill... the illest. Go support my dude Concept Oner and my entire American Trash familia.
PS. How fucking hot is this flier? Tits!
Me: You need to get up and take a shower.
Minion: But I'm on spring break and I'm not doing anything today.
Me: I don't care, you still need to handle it.
Minion: (rolls eyes)
Me: Did you just roll your eyes at me?
Minion: No.... I was just looking up.... at the ceiling fan.

Frank el Tanque

I cannot wait for this movie to come out! It has so many things that I love in it, Will Farrell, Mexicans, cigarettes, slaps. How could you not be excited, seriously? It's been a while since a solid comedy came out. I mean there was "Tucker & Dale vs. Evil" which was pretty fucking hilarious, but I'm ready for a new one. Now all I need is a date! Boom.

You can't argue with science

I'm close by

• I'm seriously addicted to these vicks vapor inhalers. I bought one for my son when he was sick. It’s no lie like the best thing ever! They must put some sort of addictive chemicals in it to get suckers like me all strung out on the shit. Well played Vicks, well played.

• Because I have been asked the question more than a few times this week…. No, I am not dead. I am totally still alive. I apologize if you were misinformed. And for those of you who were hoping I was dead… sorry. Oh and fuck you.

• Every time I see a cop car I swear I feel like I’m in trouble. 78% of the time I'm not doing anything illegal at all, but I still feel like I'm on the verge of getting thrown in the clink. Which would be awful, because I really hate bologna sandwiches and I can’t braid hair.

• Speaking of the clink… Jails these days are apparently really tech saavy! Who woulda thought right? Jail visits are dove via video monitors. And inmates now have “accounts” on which you can go online and add money into for your favorite criminal! What the fuck right? Throwing some money on your homies books has a whole new process! And I dig it!

• Chances are if I know you, I'm gonna give you a nick name slash call u whatever I think u should be called. This is usually because (a) I can’t remember your name. (b) Your name is stupid. (c) I really love you and it’s a term of endearment. (d) I strongly believe your name should be something else and I refuse to conform. My son brought his new puppy home on Friday the 13th, therefore I strongly believed the puppy should be named Jason. My son named him Oso instead. I called him Jason for about the first 3 months until my son got really mad about it and the poor dog was all confused. But because I refuse to conform I decided to call him OG Oso Cinco rather than just Oso. This is his new name.

• I fucking HATE when people call me Ange (aye-n-gee). This is not my fucking name. My name is not so extraordinarily long that it needs to be shortened. The only people that get away with this misconduct are my mom and my aunt Frances…. Oh and sometimes Ebony.

• It disappoints me when I find a song that I love and the radio gets a hold of it and ruins it by over playing it. The only exception to this rule is Dance Ass and Rack City cos these songs make for the illest car dance parties. So I pretty much never get tired of hearing them slash dancing to them. I am fully aware that they are terrible songs. I don’t care.

• Don’t leave me voicemails. Chances are incredibly high that I will never listen to it. A text however, I will reply to.

• This week has been hell. I'm so glad it’s over. In fact, I wish it had never happened at all. Yeah, I’d be ok with that.

• I’ve learned that sometimes I'm too clever for my own good. Sometimes my stellar cleverness leads me to information that I probably don’t want to know and/or see. Even though I know it’s better to have complete knowledge of a situation, I sometimes wish I was blissfully ignorant. I'm sure it would hurt much less. Being incredibly clever seems to be a bit of a curse.

• Either sticking to your guns is really really hard, or I'm really really terrible at it. Either way I wish my guns and/or self were stickier.

• If you’re going to compare someone you know to a character in history, you should do your research on said character before doing so. For example, we all know Jeffery Dahmer was incredibly intelligent. But rather that saying “You’re like Jeffery Dahmer” you should say “You’re incredibly intelligent”. Because that person will most likely think you’re calling them a murderer slash cannibal slash psychopath. To avoid this confusion, it’s best to just say what you mean and leave the comparisons out.

• It’s been a while since I’ve done one of these lists. It feels good. Happy Friday lovers, get it the fuck in!

Hit me up

This is hilarious to me, on a count of I do it all the fucking time! This lesson is one that will never be learned by me. Truth.
"I'm bulimic for my set, I'm always throwin it up" ~ Aja Black

Disclaimer: Please don't go to Compton and test these out. You will most likely be killed.  I just saved your life. You're welcome.
Happy International Women's Day!

Please Stand Up

YO!!! Extra big fucking shout out to my Foodchain homies who just announced their upcoming performance at this years SXSW music festival!! They were added to one of the hottest bills I've ever seen! The Shady 2.0 SXSW Showcase! That's big shit, seriously they should be proud! The Foodchain will be reppin the box state and blessing the stage with some extra fucking heavy hitters!!! Slaughterhouse, Yelawolf and 50 Cent just to name a few!
Congratulations my dudes, murder shit out there!! Oh and don't forget to wear your Whorebath!! :)
Oh and for those of you who can't make it all the way out to SXSW to see The Foodchain murk shit, you can catch them on April 16th at Cervantes Masterpiece with BlackStar, Mos Def and Talib Kweli.  You're welcome.

Junkyard Dog

Shout out to the homie King FOE on his new video "FOE" from his most recent project titled "JUNK" a prelude to his upcoming album "JUNKIE". Shit goes hard. You can always count on FOE to give it to you raw and unfiltered. Enjoy!

You can catch FOE performing live with the BLKHRTS at SXSW, March 15th @ Maggie Mae's. The BLKHRTS will also be performing at Cervantes Masterpiece on April 7th with Methodman and Redman. You can download the album and peep upcoming shows for King FOE and BLKHRTS at http://www.blkhrts.com/.

Siente Mi Amor





via Jeanna

Crazy Fucks

Here are a some qualities that in my opinion all humans should posses:

LOYALTY
HUMILITY
HONESTY
SANITY

While most humans posses some of these qualities, very few posses them all. Work on possessing all of them. That's what I'm doing. I've already got the first three on lock. Watcha!

DNA

New hotness from the homie Spoke. Download it. Don't fuck around.

The most real

So if you missed the Nitty Scott show last weekend, you're pretty much a fucking idiot. That shit was raw! Like I said before this chick is a straight beast. She pretty much melted the faces off of everyone in the building. Not to mention she the realest, most grounded, and super chill person ever! I had the opportunity to rock out hair, makeup and a few blunts with Nitty and Jules (her manager/DJ) and it was like I'd known them forever! It's refreshing to chill with people who have huge talent but not huge egos. Not to mention the knowledge they both came with. Ridiculous, for real. I'm extra humbled and feeling lucky to have been able to chill with the two of them! Be jealous.
This is the first of many dope shows to come from the Casuals Crew! Oh and SUPER FUCKING LARGE SHOUT OUT to Miss Nitty for rocking the "motherfucker" tee from Whorebath! Catch her radio interview here. And here's a few flicks.Boom.

Arm candy isn't served on fucking popsicle sticks!

Ok, so as an apology for my lack of posts as of late.... I give you this! This oughtta make up for it!
Once again me and one of my favorite humans, Ashley Quezada had nothing to do on a Sunday evening... So we played dress up, or undress as it seems and had a mini photo shoot. It had been a while since we'd done any photos so we thought fuck it! Shout out to Ash, her photos always make me look and feel like a motherfucking milli!
Here's what our filthy little minds came up with! The General's Booty... literally. Apparently booty pics are what it's all about these days... Whatevs. Enjoy!
  


The Truth

Ok so first off I'd like to apologize to my readers for my lack of posts. I'm a really fucking busy busy busy bitch!!! No lie! I can barely keep my head above water lately! But I'ma do better, I promise!!
Ok so to make it up to you all I'm about to put you on to the hottest show in Denver for a long fucking time.... You ready?
Nitty motherfucking Scott!!! This bitch is the truth! She is one of the dopest female MCs in the game for a while. And yeah she's coming to the box state!! So let's all consider ourselves really fucking lucky! Miss Scott will be headlining an all female hip hop show, featuring Denver's baddest female performers and artists, including Lady Speech, Bianca Mikhan, Xencs L. Wing, Karma, Alba Valerdi, and many many more!! You do not wanna miss this show Nitty is blowing the fuck up so who knows when she'll make her way back to the D!!!
So, who do we have to thank for putting on such an amazing show??? The Casuals Crew of course! This is the first of many dope shows to come from Casuals Crew! Stay ready hoes! And bring your asses on Saturday!!! And for those of you who are lame and cant make the show.... Nitty will be doing an autograph signing at Independent Records on Colfax Saturday afternoon 3pm!
Oh and rumor has it Whorebath will be releasing some limited edition art prints from artist ZebOne himself!!!
Peep game!

Beautiful Disaster

This is that new hotness from my American Trash Familia Concept Oner!! Shit is good, real good!!! Download it, you will not be sorry!! My fav track is Sunrise, it's that summertime feel good joint that we all need in the middle of winter! Yup!
Oh and keep an eye out for a new hot video from the ATR camp featuring some of my skills!!! Boom!


Oh Devil Doll....

You read my mind!
Every time you look at me
I see something I don’t want to see
my how you’ve turned into my.....


St. Christopher follow me
St. Christopher follow me
You seem to know the road better than me
St. Christopher don’t dare me ‘cause
Every time you raise your voice
and tell me I don’t have a choice
I’ve packed my bags got one foot out the door
and I won’t take no more....


Yeah You, I’m talkin’ to you
with your fucked up hair and your bad tattoos
yeah you, I’m talkin’ to you
you’ve got it all figured out
know what it’s all about
but will you ever learn to shut your mouth; shut your mouth


Go to touch me, I draw back
You gotta have your way or a heart attack
You’re gonna use me to put yourself on the map
Well I’m not your fuckin’ cadillac


Yeah You, I’m talkin’ to you
with your fucked up hair and your bad tattoos
yeah you, I’m talkin’ to you
you’ve got it all figured out
know what it’s all about
but will you ever learn to shut your mouth; shut your mouth


Can you walk on water like you say
Can you resist temptation for 40 days
Turn water into wine with the tears they sob
I didn’t think so, sit down, let him do his job


Yeah You, I’m talkin’ to you
And all the hell you made me walk thru
Yeah you, I’m talkin’ to you
you’ve got it all figured out
know what it’s all about
Yeah You, I’m talkin’ to you
And all the hell that you put me through
Yeah You, I’m talkin’ to you
you’ve got it all figured out
know what it’s all about
but will you ever learn to shut your mouth.

We're all a bit mad here...

Do you ever get to a point in your life where you stop and think ... How the fuck did I get here, to this point? This was not my plan.
That's where I am. I'm at that point. I cant quite pinpoint where exactly my direction changed course. But finding my way back to my original path has proven extremely difficult.
Just an update. Carry on.

Kiss the ring, but never touch the crown...

I'd like to take a moment to highlight one of the most amazing women on the planet, Iman Woods. Iman is truly one of the most beautiful, talented, strongest, and empowering women that I have been blessed to call a friend. Her light is absolutely immeasurable. What Iman does for women is priceless, and I am so honored and humbled to be a part of it.
Recently Iman celebrated 31 years of life! But really it was everyone who knew her that was actually celebrating the most. I know I was. Every year that I am fortunate enough to spend with Iman as a friend is a cause for celebration if you ask me. So shout out to her Mama, thank you so hard for bringing such an amazing human into this world!
I cannot wait to see what 2012 brings to our little Pin-Up family, I know whatever it is it will be motherfucking fabulous cos that's the only way we know how to do it!
Unfortunately I was unable to make this year's birthday soiree, but if you know Iman you know she does everything big! This year she celebrated in royal fashion throwing a Royal Birthday Ball! There is nothing more appropriate for celebrating Iman's life than a Royal Ball, on a count of she is truly a QUEEN.
Happy Birthday Iman, I love you Mama!